From the archival 35mm print!
There are plenty of great ways to traumatize children. You can tell them their mother’s been in a fatal car accident, or reveal that ketchup is actually dog blood. Or -- like my parents did in the summer after my sixth grade year -- you can simply take them to see THE GATE. This demon-encrusted cinematic deathcoaster was somehow marketed to pre-teen audiences despite the fact that it’s undeniably the most unhinged PG-13 film to ever hit the screen. Two metal-obsessed 12-year-old outcasts find the actual doorway to Hell in their own backyard, inadvertently releasing an unstoppable tempest of supernatural violation. Drywalled corpses, stop-motion beastopoids and adolescent self-mutilations culminate in a feature that shouldn’t be viewed by any child under the age of 40. If your kid's bed is too dry each morning, bring ‘em along to this show and it oughtta do the trick. (Zack Carlson)